


he's so devoid of color, he don't know what it means

by OnlyRoomForHope



Series: dream smp fics & drabbles [4]
Category: Dream SMP - Fandom, Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst, Author Projecting onto TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Character Study, Colors, Colour Theory, Colours, Depressed TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Exiled TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Gen, Hurt No Comfort, Hurt TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Hybrid TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Lonely TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Only mentioned though, TommyInnit Misses Toby Smith | Tubbo, TommyInnit Needs a Break (Video Blogging RPF), TommyInnit Needs a Hug (Video Blogging RPF), i strongly dislike this ngl, no beta we die like ghostbur
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-12
Updated: 2021-02-12
Packaged: 2021-03-18 12:35:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 803
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29368617
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OnlyRoomForHope/pseuds/OnlyRoomForHope
Summary: Tommy was red. He knew he was red. He’d always been red.Tommy was red, and Tommy wondered if that’s all he’d ever be.Tommy was grey. He knew he was grey. He hadn’t always been gray.Tommy was grey, and Tommy wondered if that’s all he’d ever be, if that was what he deserved, and wished he was red once more.(or: a character study on one TommyInnit, using colour meanings because those are always fun)
Relationships: TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF) & Everyone
Series: dream smp fics & drabbles [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2019857
Comments: 5
Kudos: 63





	he's so devoid of color, he don't know what it means

**Author's Note:**

> i wrote this during school  
> i honestly don't really like it
> 
> anyway yeah, basically a character study using colours :))
> 
> **[!] TW FOR POTENTIALLY TRIGGERING THEMES REGARDING BETRAYAL, ABANDONMENT, LONELINESS AND DEPRESSION [!]**

Tommy was red. He knew he was red. He’d always been red, even as the small child plucked from the nether and taken to the overworld, hand-in-hand with a blonde man in a stripy-green bucket hat. Even as a determined teen, stood resolutely tall through wars and bloodshed and betrayal. He was red.

He was a brilliant, fiery crimson. The colour of freshly spilled blood, seeping into floorboards and staining the walls. The colour of freshly picked apples, laughter filling the air, surrounded by the warmth of family. The colour of strength, the colour of danger and the colour of happiness and celebration.

He was intense, rich burgundy. The colour of wine, stiff and formal atmospheres disrupted by screaming and breaking glass. The colour of sweet cherries and giddy smiles, juice staining fingertips and mouths and tablecloths. The colour of courage, the colour of violence and the colour of ambition and individuality.

He was striking, vivid scarlet. The colour of severed roses, blood trailing down fingertips as thorns dig deep deep deep into the skin. The colour of the sun during the early hours of the day, at dawn, peaceful and calm and satisfied. The colour of passion, the colour of sacrifice and the colour of warmth and joy.

He was warm, vibrant garnet. The colour of redstone, mined slowly by calloused, blistered, bleeding hands, begging for rest. The colour of velvet, soft and swirling, exclamations of awe, thankfulness and appreciation. The colour of luck, the colour of righteous fury and the colour of healing and purity.

He was glorious, radiant vermilion. The colour of flickering flames, greedy and all-consuming, spreading and burning and painful. The colour of gentle brush strokes on a canvas, amused murmurs to sit still and innocent excitement. The colour of love, the colour of blood and the colour of life and eternity.

Tommy was red; he was crimson, burgundy, scarlet, garnet, vermilion, bittersweet, cinnabar, cherry, tomato, maroon, red.

Tommy was red; he was strength, happiness, danger, courage, ambition, passion, warmth, purity, love, eternity, determination, drive, power, life, sacrifice and joy.

Tommy was danger. He was blood, he was fire, he was despair and melancholy and revenge. He was fury and anger and he burned, burned, burned.

Tommy had faced the red of war and betrayal so many times that it shaped him. Strawberry fading to crimson, bittersweet fading to scarlet. Joy and youth and purity faded into determination and strength and passion faded into sacrifice and melancholy and bone-deep weariness.

Tommy was red, and Tommy wondered if that’s all he’d ever be.

  
  
  


Tommy was grey. He knew he was grey. He hadn’t always been gray,  ~~ crimsonburgundyscarletgarnetvermilion ~~ red slowly dulling as life went on. The death of his country, the death of his brother, the death of who his best friend used to be, the death of his drive and determination and incessant passion. Bloodshed and betrayal and broken bonds had broken his red. Had broken him. He was grey.

He was weary, dull charcoal. The colour of night, settling over a campsite like a blanket, bringing fear and dangers untold. The colour of empty, empty, empty. The colour of depression, the colour of emptiness.

He was monotonous, subdued marengo. The colour behind closed eyes, behind shut doors, crying and pleading. The colour of dull, dull, dull. The colour of loneliness, the colour of 

isolation.

He was muted, gloomy cinereous. The colour of cages, containing, trapping birds who’ll never get the chance to soar again. The colour of numb, numb, numb. The colour of regret, the colour of sorrow.

He was sombre, lacklustre taupe. The colour of stone walls, closing in as a pickaxe rhythmically digs into the wall, abandoned and forsaken and alone. The colour of void, void, void. The colour of trauma, the colour of hopelessness.

He was dreary, dismal xanadu. The colour of cold days and nights spent curled up on the sand, longing for the past, mourning the present. The colour of death, death, death. The colour of abandonment and the colour of betrayal.

Tommy was grey; he was charcoal, marengo, cinereous, taupe, xanadu, gunmetal, tin, graphite, smoke, led, slate, pewter. 

Tommy was grey; he was depression, emptiness, loneliness, isolation, regret, sorrow, trauma, hopelessness, abandonment and betrayal

Tommy was tired. He was weary, he was reserved, he was depressed and anxious and done. He wanted the world to go away and he cried, cried, cried. 

Tommy had been abandoned, blamed, betrayed and left behind far too many times. He was manipulated, he was tricked, he felt worthless. Crimson fading to charcoal, scarlet fading to taupe. Sacrifice and melancholy and bone-deep weariness was all that remained.

Tommy was grey, and Tommy wondered if that’s all he’d ever be, if that was his fate, if that was what he deserved, and wished he was red once more.

**Author's Note:**

> :D
> 
> title from Colours by Halsey  
> man i honestly don't like it. i wanted to write a fic that related characters to their colours but this happened and this isn't what i wanted :(  
> i posted it anyway cuz it's gonna waste away in my google docs otherwise but honestly, i totally understand if you dislike it too.
> 
> comments make my day, please leave me writing tips because i hate this please and thank you.
> 
> marked as unfinished because i still have pages upon pages of colour meanings so i might do it for the other characters too, hopefully in a better way.


End file.
